March 26th, 2019. I’m calling it.
Between riding the waves of progress and setbacks, I’m exhausted from having this blog always agitating the back of my mind.
There was always a hope something would come of my efforts. Maybe I’m being too impatient, lacking the steady effort needed, or set too high of standards for myself, but I’ll be happier not worrying about this for a while.
I’m not quitting golf or writing. I’ve just reached a point of no return in hopes of my dream. I don’t enjoy playing anymore and that’s the last thing I wanted to happen.
At this point, I’m not even sure I’ll be playing in our amateur tour after the next event. I’ve met some great people but the same guy keeps winning, the days are too long, and if I don’t put in $20 for skins games (which I don’t like side bets), it feels like driving an hour and paying $100 to get my ass kicked in front of strangers once a month.
The season opener went about as well as I expected, despite being tied for/in the lead after the front nine. Everything felt sloppy and unfamiliar. I had more swing thoughts than ever before as I ran through every lesson I’ve taken to coax out any semblance of a game
I did learn I’m not the competitive type. I’d rather see everyone in my foursome having a great round then to beat them (or worse, see them beat themselves). That’s probably where I didn’t stand a chance with my goal. There isn’t a raging fire in here, it’s a smoldering that’s more hearth than heat.
If you were expecting any sort of accomplishment from this journey, so was I. Reality rarely meets expectations. Maybe I needed this more than I needed my goals.
Who knows what I’ll turn this blog into after this. All I know is it’s time to take a break.
Wishing you the best in your golf game!
Until next time.